Wow

Freaking Wow. I love it.

Ernie Els: BPTNHWMTIATYIFHHWEOHY

BPTNHWMTIATYIFHHWEOHY - Best Player To Never Have Won Multiple Times in America This Year In Fact He Hasn't Won Even Once Here Yet.

But, you won't hear him being critisized for it anywhere exept on this blog. This whimpy-ass article sticks this important graf near the end, of course:

But he was the only member of golf's so-called "Big Four" -- also featuring Woods, Singh and Phil Mickelson -- without a win on American soil entering last week's Bank of America Colonial. Els, a runner-up and third-place finisher in January tournaments, is growing more confident that his victory drought may soon end, however.

Yup. Nothing boosts the confidence like a T39 finish in one of the Euro Tour's premier events.

In other news, winless Retief Goosen still first in Euro Order of Merit. Els now 4th even though he's won three times this year. That cracks me up.

A Moment For....Wild West Ninja

The Sidewinders pulled it together and won last night. Now they are a game (or 2 0.5 games) out of first.

I'm going to meet up with Blax to celebrate all drinking style. He's been going since noon -- when he woke up and found out the news.

Three words I never wanted to read in the same sentence

Golf. Blog. Virgin.

Thanks MediaGuru for subtley pointing out a new golf blog. Although, I'm gonna have to give this one a preliminary score of bogey for posting a top-five list already in its short life. Bad move.

BTW, its not that I am against all lists. I'm only against lists that are not extremely clever and highly original, unless they involve sex.

Too bad I missed this one

Apparently the USA network thought I would freaking care:

The Good Life will gaze into the lives of five PGA TOUR pros to uncover the loving families, fascinating hobbies, and luxury living that make all their lives so exceptional.

The terrible twos

+2's that is.

I'm a relatively new golfer (been going at it for a little over 2 years now) and I'm on the verge of breaking 80 for the first time. I know that I have all the tools to do it. It's been my goal all year to do it. I just can't freakin do it.

Having studied my stats, I've realized that my biggest nemesis on my quest to break 80 is the double bogey. But, it's not so much what a single double does to my scorecared, it's what it does to my focus and confidence. One double invariably leads to more doubles and/or a string of bogeys. For instance, I'll play holes 1 thru 6 at 1-over, then hit a quirky drive on 7 and wind-up with a double bogey. Having the wind taken from my sails, it's common for me to double-up on either 8 0r 9 as well. More often than not I'll do something similar on the back nine. Hence, I wind-up with a lot of 82's, 84's, 86's with three to six double bogeys on my card.

I was wondering if any of my readers have any advice for me on how to deal with these double bogeys. What do you do to maintain focus after a double bogey?

Sand Trapage

I know. I know. I did a little senseless Sand Trap bashing yesterday. But, hey, I stand by it. None-the-less, having reflected upon this original report from the Senior Open by head Sand Trapper Erik, I must say that I am very impressed. Very, very cool. It's the interesting type of content that you'll never see in a major media outlet. And, let's not forget that the guy actually got off his ass to bring us -- the folk still sitting on our asses -- some meaningful behind-the-scenes coverage of the event, and a picture of a fat guy in a yellow jacket.

To my next point: For as much content as The Sand Trap has, most of it is useless. Sad to say, but true. The competent and insightful crew posts previews, then day-by-day analyses of all three PGA tour events seemingly every week. Why? I'm not sure, because I can hop over to ESPN or SI and get the same information presented to me in a superior aesthetic package. So, what can The Sand Trap offer me that ESPN or SI can't? Well, meaningful behind-the-scenes coverage, and pictures of fat guys in yellow jackets for one. Or, in other words, first-hand reports with a personal touch.

I'm not trying to pile on the site. The best thing it has going for it is its staff of dedicated posters who crank it out consistently. That's near impossible to find in the Golf Blogosphere. I realize that they can't send someone to every PGA event, but what they can do at least is offer some personal comments about the events instead of just rehashing what happened. I also remember a very cool post that detailed the construction of an indoor putting green. That is freaking great. Day 2 LPGA stories with no flare are not.

Quotage

From around my Southern AZ golf world:

Yeah, I really like Gee-Off Ogilivy. -- Kid I was paired-up with at muni.

Let me tell you what kind of a guy I am. If I was up by a stroke on Tiger going into the final hole I'd just blow it and let him win. -- Schizo on the practice range at muni.

Me: Why don't just you just hit the ball out of the tree? Brother: Because the way I've been playing I'll probably hit my hand on the tree and get AIDS. -- My brother making an excellent point to me on the 13th at Santa Rita.

Want more Els bashing?

Look no further. Says Johnny Miller about Els in the LA Times:

He's a full notch behind Vijay. He's not even on the same rung. There's no major that rattles you like the U.S. Open. Last year's Open, probably took a month to get over that. It's not like the Masters, where the conditions are generally the same. At the Open, they're probably already rattled going in.

Els did, however, win by 13 strokes in commie China recently. That's gotta be a huge confidence booster going into the US Open. Or some sorta sham that means nothing.

(Link c/o Shackelford who hath no permalinx.)

Because I'm in just in that sorta move this morning

Why golf is better than sex. I got one: Because Danielle Aimee has huge knockers and even larger thighs. Or something.

What a skank

Looks real enough for me.

Talk, Listen

There are a lot of things you can say about Retief Goosen. But, one thing you can't say about him is that he didn't get a quintuple bogey on the first hole during the first round of the Sony Open this year.

I hate to be such a jerk, but...

Crap. Crap! I tell you...

Just what I like to see

Canuck Robert Thompson going off:

Of course, this is the same Chris Baldwin who made a recent trip to British Columbia and came back raving about Furry Creek, arguably one of the worst-designed golf courses in history and renowned as a joke.

Cry me a river

After a year of representation, Ernie Els is leaving IMG for undisclosed reasons. This article speculates that it may have something to do with the IMG memo about quasi-appearance fees that caused a big ado in the golf community.

In March, the South African had voiced his displeasure about being included in a letter IMG sent to select PGA Tour tournament sponsors regarding corporate outings. The letter listed Els and other top pros as being available to play corporate events during tournament weeks for a price of $100,000-$200,000 per outing.

"I made it very clear to IMG and to the Tour here (in the U.S.) that I'm not for it," Els said in March. "I'm not standing for it, OK. And for people to speak on my behalf without talking to me, I don't like that very much. So I made that very clear to IMG."

Seriously. 200K per outing? Shyit...he can make 2-3 times that much in appearance fees playing a tournament in commie China.

From Hooked on Golf

What an awesome story.

Enough with the damn lists...Part Deux

Why hasn't this guy been canned yet? It is beyond my ability to comprehend a professional golf writer starting a story with this line: "Tiger Woods' cut streak wasn't supposed to ever end -- especially at the Byron Nelson Championship." Says freaking who? Of course it was gonna end you freaking dolt. I read better sports writing in my high school paper.

Enough with the damn lists

Is there anything less remarkable than a top-five list of the most remarkable PGA tour records?

Actually, there is.

Memo to Christina Kim

Mix in a salad, baby...

Good Lawd

From the I-hate-to-break-it-to-you dept.

Hooked on Golf posts the results of its Player of the Year poll. I hate to break it to you, but Vijay Singh (who garnered the majority of the votes) is not player of the year...thus far. Having three wins and being no. 1 on the money list is impressive, however, Tiger's two tour victories plus his Master's win is far superior.

I am a huge Vijay guy, but I'm not going to delude myself into thinking that Tiger is somehow irrelevent because he can't maintain the no. 1 position in the World Golf Rankings. Or because he plays what seems to be half the number of events Vijay does. Moreover, it is unfair to measure Tiger by a 2001-era rubrick, which I think many people do.